Does your spouse need to change for you to have a good marriage? Maybe you are stuck in a conflict cycle that you KNOW needs to stop.

You KNOW how bad the silence or loud conflicts are for your kids.

And it is likely that you just can’t stop being hurt (offended) by what they say. There is a reason for that. Neither of you are actually able to control your behavior in that space.

It’s called, being “triggered,” and it is a physiological REACTION that needs some spiritual and emotional healing.

Chances are you have read the books, seen the therapists, even done intensives, and yet nothing has changed.

Been there, so no judgment here.

I know what it is like to just want the cycle to stop. And you do a bunch of stuff, but nothing is working. The problem is when you try to fix something broken by using things that only help when it is healthy – that NEVER works! It’s like acting as if your foot is fine when you have a pulled tendon.

Healing needs to happen before you can run properly, much less walk.

You and I both know that our marriages are supposed to glorify God, representing Christ’s relationship with the church. I’m not trying to shame you – what I want to say here is that if yours doesn’t do that, it’s NOT your fault BUT there IS something you can DO about it.

And it is your responsibility to choose to follow Him in that space and figure it out. If God is good and works all things together for good for those that are called (and that’s US if we claim to be followers) then He has a purpose and stuff for you to learn in the midst of your suffering. 

Stop buying the lie that things are hopeless – borrow my hope and let’s talk. PM or email me “hope” if you are ready to bring something New to your family – God is still in the redemption business!

We see God overhaul relationships in 6 months – and we only work with people we believe we can help, so let’s get on a call.

Love to you,

Nina