Is it Worth it?
What if one of your kids had the opportunity to become famous?
What if that opportunity meant life as you know it would dramatically change? No more family dinners, no more having a life of your own for anyone in the family – even the other kids would have to give up their favorite activities because this one child had been deemed as “special,” or “talented,” and because he was under 18, mom or dad needed to go with him to go on tour…or turn him over to secular strangers to finish his maturing?
So where you’ve worked really hard to create a family where everyone was recognized as special and talented, secular society dropped an opportunity in one of your kid’s lap that would take away your time (and thus the other kids’ perception of their worth … sorry, kids spell love “t-i-m-e” all too often), and disrupt this carefully created balance where everyone felt valued and precious.
We had an honest but loving conversation about this with one of our kids the other day. His music is taking off (not in the US, strangely enough – the genre isn’t popular here yet) but in Europe, and while we aren’t putting the “kibosh” on his missionary dream of reaching the unsaved this way, we feel led to have him finish a good chunk of his growing up and not eagerly throw him into the “be tempted by pride” arena of secular fame.
I haven’t looked at the contract yet, but we won’t be doing a ton of touring. Thankfully, my husband gets gobs of vacation time from his job, and loves to travel, so he might be able to do some, but certainly not anything full-time.
I wondered this morning about this leading we all felt.
God answered clearly, again, in His Word:
James 1:2-8 reads as follows:
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does.
I have personal experience (as do most people who stick their neck out there to lead) at how valuable the lessons of difficulty are. These are seriously just a few:
- We need to learn the difference between doing what we have been given to do for our glory, and for God’s, even when we think we fully “get it already.”
- We need to learn to not just accept, but embrace, what God has decided we should have, at the time we should have it, instead of thinking He’s wrong or mean or just not liking His choice and being discontent.
- We need to learn to persevere – because without that, we cannot stand up to the more difficult challenges ahead.
- We are easily tempted to stay immature, giving up instead of toughing things out.
- It’s way too easy to lose our character in the midst of fame or difficulty!
- We need to learn to live life for the Audience of One, instead of changing our course because we’ve upset someone, or there’s been a conflict.
- If you lead well, there will be conflict. It’s unavoidable, so don’t be afraid of it. There is literally NO WAY to lead or do anything significant without causing conflict. If you are a leader and some small percentage of people are NOT upset with you, you aren’t leading well. Check the Bible – every leader faces opposition.
- We need to be winsome in how we resolve these conflicts, learning to embrace conflict and see it as an opportunity, walking through it well, because we are called to be His light to the world, allowing Christ to shine through us.
The above points deeply apply to our marriages, as well. There are more, but those are the top few…
Dare you to take a moment and think about that right now, tying it into the Scripture. Double-dog-dare you to share what He teaches you with us here!
And know this – if you love Him, He will teach you. Your choice is whether you are teachable. Will you learn His lessons easily with a submissive heart? Or will you dig your heels in and be stubborn, lengthening the amount of teaching you’ll need to endure?
One of my favorite prayers (said nearly daily!) is, “Lord, help me learn this quickly, show me what you are teaching me through this challenge. Make me teachable.”
I think the greatest thing I’ve learned (and am still learning, BTW) is that my own frustration, anger, disappointment, and discouragement are CUES for me to see my own sin. Not to say others aren’t contributing, but I can’t change their behavior.
I can only impact my response.
So…
Our son, while a fine young man, still has some maturing to do. He needs to have some seasoning in the perseverance department. I won’t lie to you, while it is tempting to encourage him to jump on the “be all that” bandwagon and run full steam into the limelight that comes with a record deal, it’s not worth the current price. What’s truly mind-blowing to me is that He knows and trusts the Father so much, that he is of this same opinion.
But then again, His ways are not our ways.
And just for transparency’s sake, I’d be lying if said I wasn’t excited for him – but we have to be careful, we all too easily make our kids (or our ministries – or our marriages) our idols…and God doesn’t think too highly of others sitting on His throne.
So seek wisdom. Dare you to read Proverbs 2 this morning and see what He has for you.
Triple-dog-dare you to join us in an incredible journey this winter with Daughters of Sarah®. The information meetings are December 11 and 18th (come to one) at Faith Church in Milford, Ohio, (5910 Price Road), from 9:15am-10:30am in the Life Center Multi-Purpose Room.
This is the class that makes it available to churches everywhere… we’re so excited about what God is doing. Please join us. You’ll really deeply grow your relationship with your Lord and your husband.
The actual class is in January – but you need to know what you are getting into, so please come to an info meeting.
We’re also doing a taping session for the teaching segments on January 5th at Horizon’s church in Newtown, Ohio. It’s for wives, it’s a full day of marriage info – we need an audience, and it will help you in your marriage – so please come! J
There’s more information on our Facebook link here.
Double dog dare you to bring friends…Triple dog dare you to share with others and help them grow in their marriages as well, via email or on your Facebook® J. And if you haven’t “subscribed” to the blog here, please do so – I can’t wait to share more with you!
Thanks so much for being on the journey with us!
Love to you,
~Nina
Super cool. Needed to hear that today. Thank you!
So needed this…… Thank you for your words of wisdom!
Wow that is exciting! So is your heart and wisdom in the situation. Praying for you. God bless. Laura