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What to Say & How to Say It – speak up, be heard, DEEPLY CONNECT with God, yourself, & others

May 18, 2009 / Growing

Why All The Fuss About Respect?

Ephesians 5:33b: And the wife shall respect her husband...

Remember 9/11?  Three hundred and forty-three firefighters set their jaws and squared their shoulders and began the one-hundred story climb up the World Trade Center to their deaths.  What goes through a man’s mind that he actively chooses to walk into danger like that?  As women, we will never fully appreciate nor understand this unique wiring, unless we learn to communicate and connect with the unique individual God created within our own man.  Without this understanding, we are destined to live a life lonely and bereft of the intimacy for which we yearn in our marriages.   This weekend, I asked a group of marrieds which they would rather experience for the rest of their lives – a lack of respect or a lack of love… The women of course, chose being disrespected, but the men mostly chose being unloved.  The women were shocked at this, but it makes sense with how their husbands are wired.  It is my prayer that wives every where come to understand this aspect of their men and connect more deeply with them by demonstrating unconditional respect.  What’s really amazing is that when we wives get that piece right, we often are rewarded with the intimacy and love we truly desire.
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Blessings to you,
Nina

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2 Commments

  1. Gary says:
    May 26, 2009 at 8:54 pm

    I never knew this until I recently got married, but I am learning that respect is a big thing for me. I am not asking for much but just recognize that I walk into a room and say hi or if I made an accomplishment, you don’t have to go on and on about it but just recognize that I made it. I realize that many of the issues of my past really have to do with people not giving me respect. I am not saying that I am perfect and that I would deserve it all the time, but it really is respect that I and other men want. On the other hand, I need to figure out how to give love to my wife in the same manner that I want respect from her.

    1. ninaroesner says:
      May 27, 2009 at 4:05 am

      You are totally right – and it’s something that wives need to get good at – problem is that most in this culture don’t understand it, don’t recognize the impact it makes, and don’t know how. I used to struggle, but by God’s grace and some great teaching and practice, have it somewhat figured out with my husband.

      Least that’s what he says… 🙂

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