Tag Archives: Jesus Christ

Proverbs 31 Woman – Slap Her or …?

Forever will I remember the first time I heard about the woman in Proverbs 31. Sitting in Bible study with a group of older women (not just in age, but in maturity) the leader, a woman in her 70′s, read the verse and asked my favorite question ever asked in a Bible study: “Who would like to slap the daylights out of this woman?

Suddenly I felt better. And in my heart of hearts, I thought, “I DO.”

Raised with constant messages assaulting me from the checkout counter, the doctor’s office, and various other waiting rooms, the messages are all the same – women need to do this, this AND this, and even when we do, we still have more to do, and maybe then we’ll be good enough.

So when confronted with a Biblical version of “excellence” my deeply imbedded knee jerk reaction compares…and as we say in our house, “To compare is to despair.”  I confess I do not measure up to her, or the world’s standard.

It’s been a decade, and now I simply don’t care – probably because I do not compare.  :)   I don’t care that I don’t “measure up” – and I know that I no longer have to.  Not that I have stopped growing, but I have experienced enough of the Father’s love to realize that He accepts, loves, delights in, and is pleased with me just the way I am.

I know that John 14:23 says, “Those who love Me obey my teaching.” So yes, I am working on obedience.  And I get it right sometimes.  And sometimes I don’t.  But that’s okay. And if my screw ups and apologies create judgment in other people and they have to be angry at me for a while to feel better about themselves, well, that says more about them than it says about me… and I don’t own their feelings any longer.

So I can now see Mrs. 31 as an opportunity verses a measuring stick.  And that is huge for me.  Hope you get to that point in your relationship with Him.  It’s stellar.

Regardless of what you or I happen to think of Mrs. 31, I think it’s fair to announce to everyone a few things about the “gold standard girl” in the Bible… the Proverbs 31 Woman.

Meet her up close and personal here: http://classic.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=proverbs%2031&version=NASB

She’s an opportunity.

And she has servants.

And no, I’m not ascribing my dishwasher and washing machine to “servants” as some do. We have enough excess in this culture that their work isn’t as big a deal as it could be.

I mean, who else besides me has more dishes than people in the house?

Same with shirts. And underwear.

And pairs of black shoes… (I know, OUCH! Sorry about that one – and I’m guilty as charged as well…)

And the last time I checked, my dishes didn’t leap into the dishwasher by themselves.

Although some of the people in my house seem to think that they do on occasion. Thankfully not often.

Another thing, there is evidence that these many things Mrs. 31 did were done over time. So if you have three kids and a newborn and are struggling to get a shower and serve up something more creative than noodles with butter, well, have some grace for yourself and others.

Just to set the record straight, by the way, our Bible study leader was a mature Christian woman. She also recognized the struggle we have with aspiring to perfection and God’s standards. So she was having some fun with us – but then she made another point that hit home in a big way that day: The whole purpose of the Christian walk is to BE God’s Light to the world, by becoming so close to Him that we reflect His character to the world. In other words, they see Jesus in us. Because we love Him so much, His love in us spills over onto everyone around us.

Okay, so now that Proverbs girl doesn’t look so bad.

And I recognized my heart felt passion to whap her upside the head was sin…

Dare you today, if you are male, to concentrate on the verses about alcohol, listening to what God has to say to you. I know some of our readers are men, and as Kings in your castles, you can choose life or make choices that detract from your relationships. I’ve seen alcohol consumption destroy families and good men and women. It’s great the King’s mother warns of that here.

If you are female, I dare you to pick a favorite verse or two and chew on it over the weekend. Double dog dare you to subscribe to this blog above at the “email subscribe” button! Trust me, there’s enough here to choose from. As for me, I picked Proverbs 31:25 “She opens her mouth in wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.”

God, make it be so in my life ALL the time. Fill me with Your Spirit, and keep me out of the way. Amen.

Thankful to be on the journey with you!

~Nina

Love AND Respect…

In the midst of an overscheduled fall (no one’s fault but my own, and yes, that’s sin, but that’s another story) my husband and I discovered a painful truth.

We’d taken our marriage for granted.  When things are good, sometimes we just stop paying attention them.

Maybe in your situation, you are still daily showing appreciation to the son that’s “the good one,” or the employee that always performs.

Maybe in your life, you and your spouse are doing well, and you are still putting effort into your relationship on a daily basis.

We’d hit a bump in the road, through no one’s fault but our own. And it was up to us to fix it.

We’d both become too busy with work and ministry commitments due to a couple of projects coming to a head and I told him, “I guess I figured the kids needed more of my attention because they’re not adults. I figured you could handle it.”

He told me that while I was busy taking care of them and the other commitments, and while he fully understood that it was a short period of time, and yes, he could indeed handle it, he still missed me. He also said, “You need to blog about this – women need to know that while they do need to get the respect piece right, their husbands want to be loved by them, too. There’s nothing hugely wrong here, and we’ll get it turned around again, but it’s something other wives need to know.”

WOW.

“Other wives need to know??”I had no idea.

I thought I was being loving to him by showing respect!

So I decided to be more loving. And he did too. He started saying nice things to me again, pointing out the stuff I do that he appreciates, even if it’s small.  Honestly, I’m not really sure what I did that was different, maybe I started touching him more again, and being more compassionate to his circumstances.  Maybe it was just a little shift in my heart towards him…

Maybe it just made a difference that he missed me and let me know that.

He’s more than burning the candle at both ends right now, as instead of actually traveling to China, he’s conference calling – at 3am, or 9pm, all while working more than a full day during the day, and being fully engaged with us in the evenings. He’s got to be exhausted.

Saturday, I spoke at a women’s conference and the topic was, “Love One Another.” The Scriptures for loving others are clear:

1 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. 4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.8 Love never fails. 1 Corinthians 13:1-8

What’s interesting, is in preparation for the conference, God had me focus on conflict resolution. You know, that thing we frequently avoid? J I spent a good chunk of time talking about reflective listening, when to choose to enter into conflict, and then running a few exercises to help us do things a little better. I left wishing I could have had more time to actually practice the skill sets.

Oh, I pray we all continue to grow in our ability to be grown-ups and love others well.

No matter how long I live, I know I’ll always have room for improvement in this area. I’m thankful this morning that in heaven we are good! In reading Proverbs 26 this morning, I’m eager to share it aspects of it with my kids today – and put effort into my own behavior in the “love department.” I was struck by how I need to ask God for a heart that loves (and not just respects! J) my husband, in an effort to be sincere, and not just full of “charming words.”

And once again, I’m struck by the great Love of the One who made us – and how His son paid the penalty for my sin. Without belief in the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ, without confession of this Truth, and without making Him Lord (in other words, choosing daily to follow His will, not mine, for my life) this great gift just sits waiting for us.

Will you join me today? Dare you to read the Proverb and see what He has for you – it might be something completely different! Dare you also, if you’ve never done it, to tell God what you believe about Christ, confess your sins, ask for forgiveness, and accept that He does indeed forgive you. Dare you as well to join me in asking Him to help us let His son shine through our lives as we learn to love others well. J

Double dog dare you to share, comment, tweet, or join us on Facebook on the community page!

Glad to be on the journey with you! 

Father, I pray each person reading this today allows Your Great Love through Jesus Christ to transform them…into His likeness, such that the world will see Your glory through our lives.  Amen.

~Nina

Ever Been Exhausted?

And sick?

And have too much to do, with no one else to do it but you?

All at the same time?

Boy, do I know how you feel.

So in the midst of my self-induced pity party this morning, while reading Proverbs 6, God taught me two things: 1) I needed to stop whining and get to work; and 2) I needed a perspective adjustment.

If you read Proverbs 6, you will completely understand point #1.

It might even speak something different to you. :)

And #2, well, that was just a gift. And a surprise.

I spent the day dealing with a septic tank.

Yeah, I know.

Yuck.

But because God loves me enough to not leave me the same – He’s in the transformation business, you know – He took this opportunity to bless me.

And I probably would have missed it entirely if I wouldn’t have dropped everything to deal with this stinky septic issue so my husband didn’t have to – he’s got a big weekend planned with a bunch of his friends and their sons, gobs of his work to do before he can go, and I could rise to the occasion, or I could use the “I’m exhausted” reality excuse, and let him figure it out. I deal with chronic pain daily anyway, but now also have a sinus infection, been getting less than 4 hours of sleep a night for the last two weeks because of two injuries, and yet I literally felt led to be part of “team Roesner” in a way that would bless my husband.

And those of you who know me well know that I usually let life teach other people lessons, and I’m not much for rescuing or enabling or interfering with consequences. But this situation didn’t fit anything like those, and my husband just needed my help.

So I gave it.

And I was happy to – which, by the way, is major evidence of God doing a HUGE work in my heart.

As in transforming my heart 180 degrees from where it was years ago.

And God rewarded me in a small but big way. And I didn’t even have to wait for it.

And after meeting with contractors and inhaling probably too much methane gas for one day, I caught the full meaning of 2 Corinthians 3:18, which reads: 18 But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit.

Oh, I pray you can SEE at least two things: 1) it says, “are being transformed” – there’s no, “you might become like Jesus if you choose to follow Him,” here – it says, “ARE BEING,” as in, “it’s happening…” whether we want to or not. J And 2) “beholding” is a beautiful word which has two meanings here – first, that we are reflecting back to Him His Own glory through our Christ-likeness, no matter how infrequent or small it may be – and second, I read Max Lucado explain that if we do not take the time to “behold” His glory, we miss much on the road to transformation.

If you want more on that, search it in http://www.Bible.org .

And what did I SEE today?

Daisies.

Because He cares that our precious dog, named “Daisy,” recently went Home…

And suddenly, where no flowers had grown before, there was a patch of daisies, just yards away from the septic tank nastiness, just like the ones in the back yard.

Except we didn’t plant these daisies in memory of our sweet golden retriever.

God did.

For us.

So we could see Him.

And know He cares.

You might think I’m nuts, but I choose actively to SEE God, multiple times a day, in the midst of my circumstances.

I believe He’s there.

And I believe He’s always speaking.

It’s more a matter of, “Are we listening?”

So I’m over 12 hours late with this entry today, but I desire to be, sinner as I am, a person who says what she means, means what she says, and keeps her commitments. And I can’t even begin to tell you how this impacts my marriage…more on that to come… :)

And I dare you to SEE Him. And double-dog-dare you to share what you see with us. Join us on the Facebook Page and be part of the community…

Happy to be on the journey with you,

~Nina

I See You…

Saturday, I stood in the breezeway, sipping percolated coffee, watching our people play in the lake. At one point, the most mischievous of our three kiddos silently snuck towards his sister, intent upon capsizing her banana float and submerging her.

He stopped momentarily, and glanced up at the cabin. “Are you watching me?” he called, guiltily.

I smiled.

“Should I be?” I asked.

“Ugh…no,” came the reply.

“Someone’s always watching you,” I told him.

“Oh, yeah,” he said.

It’s funny how easily we forget.

God never sleeps.

And He tells us, quite clearly in Proverbs 5:21, “For a man’s ways are in full view of the Lord, and He examines all his paths.”

So He’s always watching.

That’s comforting and concerning all at the same time.

Dare you today to put your bracelet or watch (if you still wear one :) ) on your other wrist. Or, put a hair band around your right wrist.

Use it to remind you that we are never quite fully alone. Knowing that we’re never completely out of our Father’s view should help us in two ways – first, provide us with comfort when we are anxious or afraid, and two, help us walk in the His Ways, assuming we know enough of the Bible to know what They are…

I know from experience that it helps to remember He’s always there. :)

And I just love it that Someone fully “gets” me, when others who should, don’t.

It’s sooo good to know and be known.

Respecting, loving, and obeying God often results in respecting and loving others, particularly those who don’t deserve it. We are never more like Christ than when we are BEING love/respect to those who haven’t earned it. It’s not easy, but it’s the journey worth taking.

Double-Dog-Dare you to join hundreds of folks choosing to challenge themselves every day and subscribe to the blog (above) and take this journey on wisdom’s path with us!

Triple-Dog-Dare you to read the rest of Proverbs 5 here, seeing what else He might have for you today – then act upon it!

Privileged to walk with you!

~Nina