Are You Fighter or Deserver of Equality?

If all you follow is secular media, you’ve missed what should be one of the biggest stories of this decade: Gosnell’s House of Horrors Abortion Clinic. Dare you to follow some of the links – and be brave enough to expose yourself to some of the truth of this situation. Mature women are not afraid of truth, even the hard cold kind, heinous and cruel. They don’t fixate or glorify it, but they are strong enough to face it head on. Sometimes sheltering our eyes from evil prevents us from understanding the depravity’s depth. This affects us all – and who will speak for those who cannot speak for themselves?

I’m not going to repeat the gory details here, but I will simply point out that many breathing, struggling newborns had their spinal cords severed – outside the mother’s womb. And there are women who were forced to carry out their abortions – after they changed their mind.

One woman died.

And the judge is dropping charges, one by one.

Many will claim that abortion and choice is a “woman’s right” and that it is a simple medical procedure.

I respectfully disagree.


This is infanticide – and it is the result of the normal progression of a lack of respect for life and God Himself.

Visible is disrespect for the privilege of motherhood as the honor it used to be considered. Equally visible is the lack of honor at the miracle of life – even as it is snuffed out while struggling in fight against death.

We women have our “rights” – in many ways we have gone from being cherished and considered worthy of protection to considered “equal” via a path walked by shoving opinions down others’ throats, landing some in abortion clinics to execute those rights and emerge permanently haunted, diseased, and confused. I think one could argue whether equality showed up in the abortion clinic, however, as there seems to be classicism occurring in the level of care received.

In the small, this “equality” results in “little things” like my son receiving a harsh retort from a 15 year old Christian girl when he tried to open a door for her heavily-laden self. “I don’t need your help!” she snipped at him. “Fine. Get the door yourself,” he replied. What this girl in her defensive, in-your-face harsh response failed to realize is that he would have opened the door for anyone carrying as much as she had in her arms. The fact that she is female was irrelevant to him. She could have been a male friend, his mother, an elderly man or woman, a little boy, or a little girl. Regardless of her demographic, she was just a person in need of help.

And yet, I grew up watching men open doors for women not because they couldn’t get them themselves, but because they cherished them. We have lost that. Some say the price has been worth it. I don’t agree. I see too many women each day who long to be cherished by their husbands.  Our culture used to hold this as a primary ideal. Equality in the work place is a good thing, but I know there are other ways, in fact, better ways, to garner respect, as did many women (like many of our past president’s wives, Abigail Adams, in particular) in history. These women carried themselves so well they received respect because they deserved it – and they gave it freely to others. They had prestige, power, and position. But the “equality fighters” don’t like to think about the “equality deservers” because the only tools in the EF’s tool box are hammers and maybe a megaphone. The Equality Deservers garnered what they wanted from their lives by being women of strength and dignity, not by shoving their opinions down others’ throats, but rather being wise in their communication. Yes, it is unfortunate that the work was necessary in the first place, but these women moved our society forward in a way that would have landed women with the best of both worlds – now we have in some senses been lowered in status by our harsh but quick acting methods.

Good job society, church, parents, for teaching our young women of today to disdain kindness and view it as demeaning because of gender.

As men in our homes need our help to learn some of the softer sides of relationship interactions, it is true that in our society, men of the past (and still today – and btw, know there will ALWAYS be immature sinful people to deal with, regardless of gender, race, or other demographic distinction – we live in a fallen, imperfect world) have needed help in learning how to treat women. While I am thankful women are considered “equal” in pay, I disagree with the methods we are still employing to be heard. I know from both personal experience and history of women like Abigail Adams, that they simply aren’t necessary, but I digress from the issues at hand today.

I am at a loss as to what to do, however, about this atrocity as it unfolds in Philadelphia. I would love to hear ideas.

For now, I will simply add my voice to the many out there speaking for “the least of these” who cannot speak for themselves.

Dare you to share, dare you to comment, dare you to believe our God forgives literally everything, even this, and in the midst of the horror, there is grace for those of us who have swallowed morning after pills, visited clinics as patients, and extinguished life at any stage. I know many women who are burdened by this, please know you can experience healing and an end to the haunting nightmares.

Double dog dare you to weep with me today, in prayer, beseeching the Father for His mercy and His justice in Philadelphia. My heart is overcome with grief at how far we’ve slid and how history repeats its atrocities. I tremble at the thought of His wrath over these horrors.

Dear God help us.


titus 2 women leadership

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

9 thoughts on “Are You Fighter or Deserver of Equality?

  1. Thank you for courageously making us aware .. that we may pray .. especially for those women who have lived this experience …

  2. The answer dear girlfriend is 2 Chronicles 7:14. My heart aches over this and over divorce too, which virtually the same kind of lack of respect for God’s design and God’s order. And I agree about the ladies like Abigail Adams who had that presence about her – because she walked the talk and was comfortable with who God made her to be. (not to mention she was an awesome letter writer!).

    Love you Nina,

  3. I have followed this story for a while, it seems the news links in Canada are slightly different so we hear a bit more about it. Not nearly enough. Not even close. We need to have walks, tears and change. Women, and men need to understand that God created us differently for very good reasons. Having worked in male dominated fields for much of my professional life I was respected for how did my job, not because of my gender. Brave of you Nina and courageous as well to share this. I’ve taken the dare and shared, and shared the news stories as well. We need to stop being silent about these things – young mothers dying for a choice that will haunt them forever, babies being killed for convenience and worst of all we have someone who is a serial killer possibly getting away with it.

  4. Thank you for this post, Nina. I vaguely recall hearing something about this but tend not to focus on the media or news stories… It’s better for me that way. This, definitely, is something that needs attention though. I will join in prayer for all the women affected by this and all of the children who had their lives cut short in such a cold manner.

    I do want to also touch on what you said about how women are not cherished like they used to be. I have never seen what “being cherished” looks like. I am in the “working world” and I can’t even tell you how many doors that I open… for men. I can probably count on my hand how many times a man at work has said something like “oh, no.. let me get that for you” or picked up his pace to reach the door before me. It doesn’t happen very often. In fact, most of them just walk through the door as if it were owed to them that I hold it for them, without even voicing a “thank you.” For the most part, I am okay with this… because I’m not holding the door for any reason other than it’s the nice/kind/right thing to do (in my head). There have been a couple of times where I have been stopped in my tracks though and thought “man, it’d be nice if HE would have run to the door before me to open it.” My husband has commented, though, that sometimes I don’t even give him a chance to open a door for me… I guess I’m just used to doing it myself. Maybe part of the problem is that I need to take a step back, too. As I write this out, I can recall a few moments where men have asked if I wanted/needed help carrying something heavy.. Instead of saying “yes” and/or “thank you,” I have said “no, I’ve got this.” I think it’s safe to say – I’m just as much the problem as they are. Thank you for this awareness.. This is definitely an area that I need to work in.

  5. “Equality” in our culture means “just like someone else”. Women have been forced to make the same choices men make regardless of how different men and women are. Women are built to nurture life. In Western culture that has become a negative bc it requires women to make different choices than men (and men to make different choices than they may want to make ;). So, menstrual cycles need to be brought under control and breasts stripped of their nurturing associations (children love a soft place to cry even if they never nursed there, so it isn’t just about milk). Does a women have maternal urges? She should teach! I believe men in western culture have also been stripped of their paternal nurturing, but that is another rant.

  6. Thank you so much for this post! I have been following this case and trying to raise awareness and I, too am at a loss as to what else we can really do, other than contact news outlets and put pressure on them to cover the trial. Also love the perspective on the shift in how women gain respect/reject true respect from men. Makes me sad.

  7. I too am apalled and weep for young woman who are forced into actions by parents or whatever the circumstances. GOd has always been the guide and one I sought on my journey here on earth..
    My maturity has been in the ecperiences and wisdom He has given me..althougb never faced eith this..I believe He develpps us through our struggles and in turn prepares us for later and better plans all in His own timing.

Comments are closed.